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PSYC-FPX3520 Trembly Joseph Assessment 3-1
Introduction to Social Psychology
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Good, Bad and Loving
Case Study
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Mark and Joe planned a large party for family and friends. They each chose a date for the party and today is the big day. Mark selected his date, Susan, because he had seen her studying often at the coffee shop and Mark thought she was not only attractive, but that she was smart and successful. Joe invited a girl that he had seen a few times at Sam’s bar and considered her decent looking enough to invite to the party. At the event, Joe likes what he sees in Susan and when there is a moment to talk privately, Joe and Mark talk about how the party is going. Mark is insistent that Susan is giving all the right clues on how she feels toward Mark, but Joe is a little taken back by how quickly Mark is falling in love. Throughout the party, Mark is confident that he is showing Susan how much he likes Susan. Susan recognizes that Mark is attracted to her, and Susan responds, albeit in a measured way, with kindness. When Susan accepted Mark’s friend request on the social media website, Facebook, Mark just knew that he and Susan were going to be in a relationship. Unfortunately for Mark, at the end of the evening, Susan took a cab home and Mark was devastated. He couldn’t comprehend how this happened. Mark was determined not to let Susan get away and he was adamant that he would find Susan and convince her of his love for her.
This case study centers around the social psychology concept of unrequited love. Unrequited love is based on the idea that one person loves another, but the other person doesn’t reciprocate that love back (Baumeister & Bushman, 2021). Mark and Susan have interpreted their feelings in stark contrast to one another and this misinterpretation is common in situations involving unrequited love (Baumeister et al., 1993).
Research Support
Research Summary
Capturing the experience of romantic relationships can be a daunting task when everything goes as planned but understanding the dynamics of relationships that end with unhappiness can require a more thorough analysis (Baumeister et al., 1993). In Baumeister et al. (1993), two studies were conducted. The first study involved 71 participants who submitted autobiographies containing unrequited love where both the rejector and the potential lover positions were expressed. In the study by Sinclair & Frieze, (2005), two hundred and forty-one undergraduates provided their perspectives of being the pursuer and the target on unrequited love. People tend to see their approach as being more correct than the other party regardless of whether they are the pursuer or the target (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005).
Research Interpretation
The research makes clear that unrequited love can lead to undesirable effects on both parties (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005). The pursuer feels justified in their attempt to build the relationship
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and will identify the many instances where the target gave them the green light to continue pursuing (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005). The target views most of the actions of the pursuer in a negative light and don’t see where they gave an impression of love (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005). Guilt was a primary factor in the pursuer’s actions as the study has shown that there is a lot of guilt when one gives love, but it isn’t reciprocated (Baumeister et al., 1993).
Application of Unrequited Love
Mark took the way that Susan looked at him and held his hand as confirmation that Susan had as much affection for Mark as he did for Susan. Accepting his friend request seem to be the deciding factor that Susan was the one. He expressed to Joe that Susan was the real deal and after today, he and Susan would be together. At the end of the evening, Susan had taken a cab home and Mark was completely shocked. He took the cues from Susan that they were both in love with one another and now that she left him, he was unable to accept the truth of the situation. Mark decided he was going to track down Susan and make her realize how serious Mark was about the relationship. Mark was even going to go so far as to post about the relationship on Facebook. Being rejected can bring on a lot of emotions and cause the person rejected to take action that only further exacerbates the situation (Baumeister & Bushman, 2021).
Mark’s approach to track down Susan is akin to stalking her and that is a clear sign of unrequited love (Baumeister et al., 1993). Stalking is a form of intimate violence regardless of how the stalker may perceive their actions (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005). Instead of perhaps accepting that Susan wanted to take a cab home, Mark became upset and more determined to have his way. Mark was also unable to see that Susan was being measured in her reciprocal affection and perceived the situation to be totally different than how Susan saw it (Baumeister et al., 1993). The heart of unrequited love is that one person loves another, and the other person doesn’t love back (Sinclair & Frieze, 2005). Clearly, Mark was perceiving this new relationship to heading in a direction that it wasn’t.
Ethical Reasoning Application
Ethical Concept
Causing harm can be related to physical harm, financial harm, emotional harm, and psychological harm (McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin, 2020). Understanding the harm being caused is an important consideration in relationships (McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin, 2020). By taking the time to reflect on how one’s actions might be creating harm by asking probing questions, harm could be minimized or eliminated. Placing oneself in the position of the other person is also a beneficial ethical consideration in reducing harm to others (McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin, 2020).
Supportive Evidence
Mark began the process of causing harm when he chose Susan to be his date by assuming Susan fit perfectly into his narrative of the perfect date. Mark never got to know Susan to see if their personalities aligned with one another. On the night of the party, Mark had already set himself up to perceive the situation in a way that was only beneficial to him. Once Susan showed him any affection, he ran with it and was unable to see the situation in any other way. When Susan took the cab home, the foundation for the harm was already established and now Mark began to react in a way that he hoped would salvage his relationship. Mark’s decision to track down Susan is a form of intimate violence that surely would result in both emotional and psychological harm to Susan. But it would also perhaps result in psychological harm to Mark. Threatening to post to Susan’s Facebook page may also cause emotional harm to Susan. Mark may have felt justified in causing harm, but as we know from unrequited love, one party loves the other without reciprocation. This is not a justification to cause harm.
Critical Thinking Application
Critical Thinking Issue
Critical thinking involves understanding various aspects of the mind and how to channel that information into making decisions that are sound and with confidence in reasoning (Critical Thinking and Concept of Confidence in Reason | Essay Sample, Words: 1557, 2020). Confidence of reason is also indicated by knowing that not only you can develop reasonable conclusions based on the actual evidence, but also in in knowing and respecting that other people can do the same. Contrary to confidence in reasoning, we wee distrust of reason where we ignore what is happening and instead focus on our skewed intuition of the facts.
Supportive Evidence
Mark began his relationship with Susan by developing his appreciation for her by looking at external observations without considering all aspects of who Susan was. Mark was confident that Susan viewed him as he viewed her and that her minor show of affection was more just being kind in the social environment. Mark didn’t apply confidence of reasoning as evidenced by not considering that Susan may not have the same feelings. Mark never communicated his feelings and did not invite her thoughts into the equation. Mark relied on his gut instincts, and this did not work out for him. His aggressive approach to wanting to track Susan down is indicative of Mark not trusting the evidence; which is the opposite of confidence in reasoning.
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References
Baumeister, R. F., & Bushman, B. J. (2020). Social Psychology and Human Nature (5th ed.).
Cengage Learning.
Baumeister, R. F., Wotman, S. R., & Stillwell, A. M. (1993). Unrequited love: On heartbreak, anger, guilt, scriptlessness, and humiliation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64(3), 377–394. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.64.3.377
Critical Thinking and Concept of Confidence in Reason | Essay Sample, words: 1557. (2020, September 4). WritingBros. https://writingbros.com/essay-examples/critical-thinking-and-concept-of-confidence-in-reason/
McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin. (2020, January 15). Causing Harm - Ethics Unwrapped - UT Austin. Ethics Unwrapped. https://ethicsunwrapped.utexas.edu/video/causing-harm
Sinclair, H. C., & Frieze, I. H. (2005). When Courtship Persistence Becomes Intrusive Pursuit: Comparing Rejecter and Pursuer Perspectives of Unrequited Attraction. Sex Roles, 52(11–12), 839–852. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-005-4203-4
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